Diriku sungguh tak keruan

I was in my FB when I saw a pic of a friend who was so lucky to celebrate Eid back home.

In the pic, I saw her and family, sat around in circle, waiting turn to seek forgiveness.

At the minute I saw her pic hugging her mother in the morning of Eid, I broke in tears really badly. The last time I hugged my mother during Eid was in a motel out of nowhere in New Mexico when we were on road trip to Cali.

The very next year, mak was on her own flying to New York to attend my wedding at Vienna. Ever since, I pretty much spent my Eid either alone before rushing back for exams or class presentation, or quietly with M.

In recent years, I have seen some changes or progress of how I normally celebrate Eid in perantauan. Rather than decoying the Malaysian mood by boiling a packet of Maggi, a dear friend invited us to celebrate Eid with them. The fact that she is a very good cook and she made rendang exactly like Mak made (they both come from the same state), Raya is merrier than drenching myself with tears.

Whatever it is, most importantly about Eid is the prayer, for me, at least. Although being away from home has forced me to minimize the suasana. I am blessed and so grateful to Allah for the opportunity to experience another Ramadhan and another Syawal.

Who knows, next year, my Eid will be somewhere else. Insyaa Allah